summer recap: May

so... here goes a summer recap, starting with may. idk how this is ganna work, so hereeeee goes!

May:
-district V horse show! i had a ton of fun, got to see muh best fraaand, and show parker. yay!
-aqha open show: just a small open show that was aqha pointed. did really good!
-beach: yup, i went down there saturday afternoon and stayed til monday afternoon. my ONE beach trip this whole year. woooo.
-grandma died. thaaaats pretty much the 'hightlight' of my summer. everything has revolved around THAT.

so i can't think to too much more that happened in may.. aha, may 31st moste DEFF changed my life forever.

random thoughts..

I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they've invented the lighter?

Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.

That's enough, Nickelback.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be ending a work email with the phrase "Regards" again.

Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.

There is a great need for sarcasm font.

Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the f*ck was going on when I first saw it.

I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.

The other night I hit a new low at an open bar. I had already hopped on highway blackout when, inevitably I had to find a bathroom. Eventually I decided it was probably on the other side of the bar so I tried to walk over there, but ran into a guy coming the other way. We played that, Both go left, Both go right game to no avail, so I finally put out my hand to guide myself past and that's is when I realized, yup, that's a mirror I just tried to walk through. And the guy on the other side is me. Even cats can recognize their own image.

How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.

A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.

Was learning cursive really necessary?

Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".

I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.

My brother's Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads. Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired about the name. He explained, "Cuz we beat you, and you hate us." Classy, bro.

Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

I love the sense of camaraderie when a n entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in' examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies"

What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?

While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.

MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.

Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

I would like to officially coin the phrase 'catching the swine flu' to be used as a way to make fun of a friend for hooking up with an overweight woman. Example: "Dave caught the swine flu last night."

I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

Bad decisions make good stories

Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!

Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?

If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.

Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a problem....

You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.

Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.

There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

"Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

While watching the Olympics, I find myself cheering equally for China and USA. No, I am not of Chinese descent, but I am fairly certain that when Chinese athletes don't win, they are executed.

I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damnit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day.. What a waste.

When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.

I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...

As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.

I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

I think that if, years down the road when I'm trying to have a kid, I find out that I'm sterile, most of my disappointment will stem from the fact that I was not aware of my condition in college.

Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it.

Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...

My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?

It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link takes me to a video instead of text.

I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.

I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimate d that there must be at least four people eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There's nothing like being made to feel like a fat bastard before dinner.

school. blah.

monday, august 17th. yaaaay. school started today. my online class did, anyway. so... i did my first 'assignment' called 'icebreaker'. i had to talk about myself & post it in the 'fourm' section or whatever. yaaaaaay. not, actually. whateverrrr. i'm just like, greatttt.. audios summer.

kinda sad.

but inspires me to write a summer review.. maybe i can do it someday.

i'll keep ya posted on how intro to human bio goes...

FRAYED KNOTS...SAY WHAAAT!? &i'm 17 :)

okay. rewind 2 weeks. starting last monday, we had youth week! last year it was great, so i was looking foward to it this year. mel & jonathon were our fearless leaders, and will came up with our name [uhmm, translation, he was hte only one who came up with *A* name, period] and we's wur the Frayed Knots. much, much MUCH better than Bloody Ax Murders (bam) so yeah. thanks for saving us from a horrible name will (: siiiince i don't have my after-nine's [yeah, thanks mom] i only got to stay for the whole thing 2 nights, but i was able to play in the games 3 nights. night number 1, mega game thingeys. basically, we got to shoot 'machiene guns' [epic fail] and push bo (hilary) around in a big socccer ball. yaaaay! night 3. messy night. amy and i had to crack open eggs and drop them into cups ontop of each other, and i'm very happy to say we BEASTED it! then taylor & hunter threw the eggs at each other, and michael slid the egg down dave's shirt. it was hilarious. then it was the mega relay, which was like canada's version, only BETTER! i had to sit in pudding [ewwww!] and then the log roll thingey, and the zig-zag thingey. yeah. its pretty safe to say we BEASTED. uberly! 'frayed knots, say what say whaaaaatttttt. friday night was the lock-outttt! wooo. it was so much fun. ice-skating was AWESOME, i only busted my knee ONCE, and i got to hang out with maggie slaughter some! shes really cool (: frankies was SHMAZING. simply SHMAZING. i rode the spinney thingey with josh [since amy's a WUSS. jk, ily!] and ONLY ONCE. it was amazing tho. amy video'ed it! since i was FINALLY 16, i could do the road course, and lemme tell ya. i pretty much beasted. 1st time was a fail tho, cause the course is SLICK, and you had to figure out how to drive it. 2nd time was better. 3rd time, my OWN FATHER spun me out. THANKS DAD, love you too. 4th & final time, i beasteddddd. there were 13 people on the track, all from our group, so it was smazing. i passed amy, josh, mr. chad, mr. jeff b., dad, &mr. tad, and i was like nose-to-nose with mr. robert... it was amazing (: theeen we ate, and amy, josh & i ended up eatting with bo (hilary), michael, elaini, and will. it was hilarious, except for when will & i ran out of drink, and i went and stole my dads, and i had drink and he didn't. hah, sorry suckerrrrrrrr. jk, you know ily (; anyway. supper was gooooddddd. then BOWLING! on the way from frankie's to the bowling alley, it was midnight, a.k.a. my BIRTHDAYYYY! so like a billion people called me on the way, haha. maygen's phone call was so sweet (: ily babeeee. anyway, bowling was so much funnnnn (: i gots a strike tooooo! right when "crank dat" came on. i felt like the song gave me luck. (: haha.. then we went back to the church and basically did nothing.. had a FAiL attempt at sardine's, then we ate breakfast at 4, listened to bert sing w/ rockband, aaaand yeah. we were pulling out at 6:07, lol. theeeeen we went to harris teeter to get stuff for my birthdayyyy! burgers, ice cream cake, and baked beans. i think sooooo (: anyway, i was in bed by 7:15, and i slept till 2, got up, checked my 17 missed calls & 8 voicemails, went back to sleep, got up at 5 and got readyyyy. miss peggy & sherlon and papa came over, we ate, then i opened my presentssss! i got a pearl for my necklace, versachi sunglasses, money, 2 vera-bradley pieces, and enough money for an ipod touch!

which, if your amy or meagan or annie, you'll understand my naming problem. it was going to be maggie, but THEN, i saw the proposal. it will now be named andrew :D &if you've seen the movie, you'll know why& stuff.

so, last friday parker finally got new shoes, so i could start riding again. i've ridden 3 times since then [friday, wednesday, and today] and oh my gosh, can i ever feel it in my knee. my knee hadn' hurt pretty much all summer, since i hadn't been riding and i haven't skiied, but since i started riding again, owwwwwieeee.


but, on the good side, parker has been doing great! i'm having to push more, [which i LOVE!] but we are still having a little trouble with our right lead. [imagine that] but thats okay. i'm really happy with how hes doing after all summer off. i'll still prolly only be able to hit the state fair in october, but thats okay. i'm having a ton of fun riding and messing around and stuff. today, i shampoo'ed and conditioned his mane and tail, and then my hose split so i had to switch hoses, siiiigh.

annnyway. thats about whats been going on lately...

GO WOLFPACK! wait, i mean, uhhh... TOBS!

woooo!

i spent wednesday night wiff muh best fraaaan! and lemme tell you. nothing makes life better than going to a baseball game, becoming friends with the usher, and eatting ice cream at 2 am, and just laughing yourself crazy with your best friend. it makes errrrything better! and, sleeping til 11 cause you CAN, and eatting BREAKFAST at 1 cause thats what you wanna do, then playing cards wiff your ovverr fam-wey.

AAAAND, i'm leaving today to go to lake gaston w/ skinny wanda, katharine, emily, waddles, maria, and AMY EWIZABEFF! <---, aka, the best fraaand.

&we're still waiting on kathryn's baby...

SO. get at meeeeee :D

life sucks?

i got to thinking.

isn't it just easier to say "life sucks" when stuff is going bad, rather than to recognize that it could be a consequence from our previous actions?

and idk. care to disagree.. its just something i've been thinking about.

so there. a deep theological thought.. sorta.

nope, didn't die in canada.

hi! still here.

got back from canada. i can't EVEN explain that trip, it was by far one of the best things thats ever happened to me, and most definately the best week of my life.

but i'll talk more about that later.

i'm still alive, still breathing, but barely.

it hurts.

alot.

&when you think you can't take it anymore, thats when best friends come in handy.

so yaaaaaay! for amy elizabeth speight! i love you baby girl (: